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It's Back to School

 Senior Year is here!!!!! I have been thinking about this for a while now and it is finally here. I don't want to rush through it and miss all the moments it will bring. My goal for this year is to enjoy the moment, live in it, not worry so much and have fun. Life will move faster than I want it too and I want this to be the best year ever.
 I feel like it is so easy to get focused on where you are going and what you need to get done and lose sight of where you are right now. When I was getting ready for school this summer, it seemed like the world was against me having the Senior year of my dreams. I was frustrated for quite a while. I had it all planned, I knew exactly how it was going to go.
 My joy for the new school year was gone and felt like I was going to waste it. Then it hit me, I was the problem. I had the plan, I had the ideas, I did the planning, I was robbing my joy.  I was my own enemy. We have all heard how we need to give God our plans and commit everything to him and if you are like me you think you do.
 However, I am learning more and more how much I am challenged in this area. I often plunge head first into life and come running back to God when it goes wrong and I have screwed it up. How much easier would it be if I gave it to him in the first place? If I had given God my Senior year first, sat down with him and asked...
  Lord,  what do you want with my Senior year? What am I suppose to do? How do I use it to serve you? My life is yours.
                   ~ Me
Praying a prayer like that is REALLY hard for me to do. Though deep down this is what I want and this is how I long my heart to be. My selfish desires to hold on to everything and do everything myself over powers. Yet, God is teaching me he is bigger than all of my problems and short-comings. He will help me get over this barrier in my life.
See he never leaves, I am the one who goes out on there own. Every time though, God is right there in the open door of the kingdom of God (my home) with arms wide open saying "Come on let me help you."
He is going to go through this year with me and all the years to come. I will find JOY in life everyday because of him. I will have PEACE because God holds my future. I will have COMFORT because God is the greatest comforter of all. I will have LOVE because God has the greatest love of all. I am BLESSED because God gave me a family who love me, who stick by me and who never give up on me.
A verse that has been sticking out to me lately is

Psalms 127. 1- 2
  "Unless the LORD builds the house, the builders labor is in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain. In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat- for he grants sleep to those he loves."

 I can't totally tell you what I adore about this passage, except that it shows me that with out the Lord I will get no where and it reminds me of how he has every detail of my crazy life in his hands. Anyway that's what has been floating around in my head at any rate.

This is me walking around the block on the first day of Senior Year
I have done this for as long as I can remember. I don't remember what provoked me to start. 
Probably something with my crazy desire to be like "real school." Little did I realize how much I would treasure the fact my parents took on the task of schooling me at home. They have been their 365 days a year from beginning to end. Next year I will be walking around a campus and not a country town block. So here is to that kindergarten girl who wanted to be like "real school" 




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